Thursday, August 11, 2005

Second Thoughts

I got a posting from 'Dirk' that really hit a nerve. He's encouraging me not to play with fire and to put the cuckolding plans on indefinate hold. I think he may be right. Please, please will anyone that has experience or thoughts on this topic please weigh in with your comments. I'm already resolved to slow down.

I just need to give this more time and think about it since once done, I can never undo it.


Henry Nelggs said...

I would agree with the messages the advise waiting. There are multiple dimensions along which this couldn't be undone.

* Sexually transmitted diseases, one of those things monogomous relationships help protect us from

* A possible feeling of betrayal--either you husband feeling you've violated the emotional content of your vows or you feeling that you have done so.

* Reputation. Depends on your community, but I wouldn't figure on anything staying truly confidential forever.

* Emotional connection. What if you find an emotional attraction to your ex rekindled (given that you once had a relationship with him, not impossible). That is a very different dynamic for you, your husband and your marriage than a purely physical outside relationship. (I actively avoid one of my ex's for fear of into old relationship dynamics--didn't work out, but it was fun.)

The potential for buyer's remorse her just seems crushingly huge. You can capture _some_ of the same dynamic without cucking by satisfying your sexually desires without him--in his presence and making it clear that you find your dildo, vibrator, other toy more satisfying than him. You can be as scornful as seems appropriate. You can even make him help you--teach him how you like a vibrator used. The dynamic is a little different for me, but that is something my Queen has done with me.

I hope this is of some use. At a minimum, I'd say walk away from the idea for a month and see if it still interests you as much.

tim said...

I would agree with henry and dirk. What You have sounds very special and to be could all change dramatically.

take it more slowly i think