Thursday, June 15, 2006

Intimacy

When we are engaged in sex, we are conscious of certain sensual details. The feeling of hair sweeping across our cheeks, scratching against our eyelashes. The warmth of a hand on our waist, the stickiness of it pulling away from our warm body to reposition itself elsewhere. The push of your lover's exhale from their chest against yours followed instantly by his or her breath. I believe these sensual details to be at the heart of physical intimacy.

When I describe sex, it seems as if I often recount the story of two shadows making love. The positions of bodies, the start-stop of intercourse, the movements, rhythms and syncopations of two silhouettes disconnected from their other senses. If these descriptions are to inform the reader at all as to the actual events, than they are by their very nature less intimate than the experience itself. I suppose this is at it should be.

I write this because I think it is a metaphor for what my husband tried to describe for me after our dinner party concluded. He said he felt as though we were playing our parts, but there was no true intimacy amongst any of us. I agree. I think the nature of casual aquaintences congealing into sexual activity is less than just the warm kisses of my husband on my ankles when he rubs my feet. I think we reached for something bold, but instead found an experience that might have been on par with an adult film. At the time it was quite absorbing, but afterwards, there was no intensity of his submission to enjoy. Furthermore, my husband has been quite himself since the evening ended. This was very unlike our past experiences in which my nurturing was his opiate.

8 comments:

Lpet said...

It's really ironic that you posted about the lack of intimacy in your encounter because I wrote to a woman I have a D/s relationship about that very issue yesterday. With all due respect, because I love reading your blog, this episode did nothing for me (fact or fiction, I don't care!) because of that lack of intimacy of which you speak.

As a potential cuckold, I am most interested in my lady's intimacy with her sexual partner while I'm being cuckolded...and in her intimacy with me after the fact.

Without intimacy, the entire idea does nothing for me personally!

Jerry said...

I read all of your blog, and unlike some others here, I do believe you. I/We have had many of our own experiences, not at all unlike yours. Of course, there are so many who wish they could that they do not believe those who do, but that is really irrelevant. The thing that caught my attention here was the similarity of my experience. When she played with another man, either alone or with me present, there was a much stronger sense of intimacy, more submission on my part, more Dominance on hers. When she played with another couple, it seemed too much like a script, or something purely physical. Not boring, mind you, it was and is a turn on for her, and me to some extent, but there is not that raw emotion that triggers the intensity of the moment.

Haaaaaaa said...

I read here often, but don't comment much. It looked like the couple you had over just wanted accomplish two things:

1) To play at what you do for real. The things she said where out straight off these cuckold sites you see on the Internet.

2) She was attacted to you and wanted to be with you.

Wayne C. Rogers said...

Intimacy is something that develops over a period of time. One doesn't go to a "swinger's party" to find it. A "swinger's party" is about finding someone to have a new sexual experience with, hopefully an experience that's both fun and exciting. I think Lady Katherine and husband accomplished that. They met a wonderful couple, along with a third party, and had a rather hot sexual experience that I'm sure was fun for everyone. Lady Katherine may even have influence the other lady into experimenting with a Female Led Relationship. I'm sure that Lady Katherine and her husband at least triggered some curiosity on the other woman's part. Anyway, the writing as usual is excellent and truly sensuous to the reader's mind.

Curious George said...

What you wrote is very true. An orgy isn't about connecting on an emotional plane, but a physical one. After everyone's got theirs it can be downright awkward or it can lead to pure emotional openness. It just all depends.

There's also the potential for the unexpected. The person you've just fucked tells you they've fallen in love with you. What you thought was just two bodies making each other feel good was perceived 180 out by your partner.

I've had incredible sex with someone I barely knew followed by equally good if not better pillow talk. First we shared physical passion, then we shared souls. And when the night ended we knew weren't going to see each other again, we each had significant others, but we shared something we each other we couldn't share with them and we parted as friends.

danesq71 said...

Ms. Katherine,

I for one thought the encounter was awesome reading and thing you really should do the commerical site your contemplating. Any news on that front?
Dan

softncuddlyguy said...

Katherine, Three months ago you wrote: "While there is more story to tell, I am delaying the details. The after effects of the evening on my husband's emotions are as they were before, and he is always my priority."

Will you ever share the details?

chris said...

What you experienced is something very common if you are open and sensitive enough to experience it. It is the experience of senseless sensations. It is one of the main reasons why I feel that casual sexual encounters with changing partners do not work for me. They tend to be empty.