Thursday, March 23, 2006

Clarification and Comment

I would not describe my husband's post-cuckold experience as a melt-down. The experience, however, does create a very heightened state of emotional sensitivity in him that requires intense nurturing on my part. It connects us in a way that nothing else can substitute.

I certainly do not allow him to orgasm in the moments and days that follow the event, but rather will save his orgasm as a symbolic (and even bio-chemical) conclusion to the stage of emotional intensity in which we now find ourselves.

13 comments:

oldbear said...

Hi Lady Katherine, I sort of figured that you guys would bond closer after the turmoil your husband experiences. I also figured that you would be nuturing him extra during the time of turmoil.

What I did not anticipate was Wayne's comment about the need for delayed orgasm. As soon as I read it I thought, bingo, he might be on to something. Like a silly goose that got me wondering if you had let hubby orgasm already! But as you have with all else, you already had a great plan to deal with the situation.

I LOVE the idea of Hubby's orgasm as the last part of this cuckolding episode, and a special way for you to share your bond of intimacy AFTER you work TOGEHTER through the troubles.

You are one sharp Lady, and a heck of a wife to hubby! PAX to you guys.

Pleaseletme said...

Lady Katherine,
You are on top of this situation in a way i have seldom encountered in my 'travels' on the net. i use the term 'top' consciously.

In my world, this would be huge to wrap my mind around. Cuckolding is playing with fire in any relationship. i wish You both the best as You absorb these next steps.

Many of us are hoping, i'm sure, that our Superiors have not read about the choice You have Your husband. Your descriptions of what has ensued had made my locked Little One twitch against his walls. Thank You for Your continued updates!
pleaseletme
letmeplease.blogspot.com

Curious George said...

I beg to differ. You're ignoring the obvious. If your husband goes into a deep funk after playing around with you and Jim he's either one hell of an actor playing the devastated cuckold to the max or he really is emotionally torn by what he's experiencing.

Nearly a week after your Saturday night with Jim and you are unable to post in its entirety what happened that night because your husband is a walking train wreck tells me someone is either blind to the obvious or is married to a man worthy of an Oscar.

Every marriage is different and every cuck reacts differently, but I have a good idea based on personal experience when my queen has pushed me too far emotionally. You and your husband need to establish some boundaries or he needs to come clean and fess up that being emotionally needy afterwards is part of the allure.

Haaaaaaa said...

Perhaps your husband's strong emotions stem from elements of the evening that he didn't anticipate. I noticed two major differences between Cuckolding Night #1 and Cuckolding Night #2: 1) You started without him and 2)Jim verbally dominated more this time than you.

I think the initial seduction of your wife and the initial entry byt he bull into her are the most powerful moments during the cuckolding experience. Your husband missed that part of the evening. Also, your husband submits to your LFA not some other guy. He may not be prepared to submit to anyone but you.

Just my two cents....

Owned man said...

When my wife started seeing other lovers, it was a couple of months before I ever even met one of them. Even now, I have watched, but never helped. She DOES leave my "needful parts" locked away, until I convince her that I am not jealous.

greg said...

My wife suggested I read your blog. I did read the majority of it, thank-you for sharing your experiences. Maybe you or one of your readers could help us out. My sexual stamina isn't up to my wife's standards. My choice had been to improve or else. You can guess the results since I am posting to this blog. She has a friend and would prefer he come here, nothing hidden. It is my role that is in question. I actually think it would be easier for me to accept if I adopt a submissive posture with him as I do with my wife. Just not sure how to start this all off and a bit concerned about possible pitfalls. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

oldbear said...

Hi Greg, Hold on pardner!

Lack of stamina is about the worst possible reason for her to have other lovers.

I say so because it is easily fixed by some combo of a few things...sprays to desensitize the penis, or a tight cockring. These work if the problem you call lack of stamina is premature (30 seconds or a few minutes=too short for her needs) ejaculation.

If by lack of stamina you mean you can not give her the hard, ongoing, rythmic stroking she desires, fix your diet and work out.

If by lack of stamina you mean you aree not a typical premature ejaculator but she needs more than 10 or 15 minutes of thrusting, then you have few options. Improve your technique so you do a better job of stimulating key parts of her genitalia sooner, or improve your mental control over your orgsms so you can resist ejaculation longer, or some combo of the two.

Try studying some sex guides or tantric manuals.

On the OTHER hand, if this is about her exercising female sexuality to drive you deeper into submission it is a differnt matter. If that is so, she should be honest about it. Unless of course you crave humiliation and she enjoys it too. Then saying you ar elacking in stamina is fun for both of you.


If you are going to go ahead with it, read some of the other sites that advise on this, they all say, go slow, make sure the marriage stays the primary factor, agree to stop and reevaluate if there is a problem.

Of course we have scant info from you, start your blog and post some. For example, if she is a hard core female supremacist and you have always been deficient, maybe She will not alllow you any input at all. If she has tasted better loving she may not want to stop getting it.

As Elise Sutton says, this is playing with dynamite. My objections and reservations are posted in a response to this blog abotu the time Katherine first cuckolded hubby.

My main ones are the possibility of transferrence of positive emotions to the fuck toy and erosion of any special feelings that may exist in the marriage; also the breaking of any solemn vows that may have been taken before friends, family, and a faith community.

To answer your direct question about wther to be sub to her fuck toy, and wether her toy becomes her lover and you are diminished in her eyes, only you two can work it out.

Some guys like Wayne C rodgers and owned manhave been cucked. I have not and dont plan to ever be. Best to talk to them about the emotions you will feel and the pain you will incur.

Good luck my friend, and plese be careful, you only get one you to play around with!

Queen'sKnight1 said...

Greg,

Talk to your physician. Some SSRI (Select Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors) are effective for premature ejaculation. A new SSRI that is to be released soon, Dapoxetine, is specifically designed for the treatment of p.e.

Old Bear is right about Tantra. I do not last very long during coitus, so I try to make up for that with cunnilingus and Tantra. Through Tantric massage, I have kept my wife in a series of multiple orgasms for 57 minutes straight. One other time I had her in one continual orgasm for 45 unbroken minutes. Through Tantra, she has experienced female ejaculation. Tantra takes practice and commitment. Both partners must be in the right mindset. It actually comes easier than one might expect, however.

If the female desires to give the male pleasure, Tantra is just as positive for the male. Orgasm and ejaculation are two completely separate events. For the unskilled male, they happen simultaneously. For the typical male, ejaculation follows very quickly after orgasm begins. Orgasm typically ends when ejaculation is complete. Once orgasm begins, however, there are two techniques which a male can use to allow the orgasm to continue without ejaculation occurring. The western technique is to bring the PC muscles to such strength through exercise that the man can simply clench down during orgasm to prevent ejaculation. The eastern (Tantric) method does the opposite. Tantra allows the male to enter such a deep serenity that the PC muscle becomes virtually anesthetized. Getting through the first orgasm without the onset of ejaculation is the most difficult. After that, each one gets easier. My wife once kept me in a state of continual orgasm for 15 minutes. Another time she gave me six consecutive non-ejaculatory orgasms, each of which was about five minutes long and spread over a period of an hour, and then decided she wanted me to be in her and to ejaculate during the seventh. At the beginning, these orgasms are less intense than ejaculatory orgasms, but as subsequent orgasms come on, they build to a point that far exceeds the intensity of ejaculatory orgasms. I still do not last a long time during coitus, but Tantra has given us both an incredible ecstasy that bonds us deeply.

oldbear said...

Queensknight, you seem like an intelligent and well-informed man.

Would you please consider starting yor blog and/or putting in an email address so you can add to our community of female adorers more often?

Thanks for some inspiring information!

OB, the long-lasting but not THAT long lasting ursa! :-) Tantra seems a compelling and enlightening view of women , sex, the cosmos, and spirituality. I am trying to learn more about it. "Get Some" Tantra.

Lady Julia said...

Katherine, would you consider having your husband comment from time to time to offer his perspective? Or perhaps, his starting his own blog? It would be very interesting to see the entire dynamic.

greg said...

Thank-you Oldbear and Queens'knight1 for your suggestions. I will try them but the horse is all ready out of the barn. I was warned and given even more opportunites to improve, and knew the consequences of failure. She is interested in the results of these techniques but isn't waiting for them. If you have any specific sites that discuss these methods PLEASE send them along.

Still feeling my way about my role in all this. But now with these suggestions very motivated to try again and improve my performance. We have discussed it, she believes both positive and negative reenforcement will be tried.

Thanks again for your inputs.

oldbear said...

Hi Greg, no offense amigo, but please keep in mind YOU, not so much her but YOU, are playing with dynamite by going along with cuckolding. If you still have any will/temerity/ability to resist her.

Also you never did answer when i asked if she is being literal when she says the reason she is seeking outside sex is your lack of stamina.

There is a whole relationship between you two we are not privvy to in this blog, but i would be remiss if i did not say that it seems she just wants to have outside sex. Stamina=?=excuse.

Lack of Penile Stamina is a ridiculous excuse for seeking other partners in the name of female pleasure, as ALL my 100 percent lesbian friends can attest.

Sorry Amigo, but that's the truth as it appears to me.

bruno said...

how do you come with so many ideas. i am trying to write on my cash advance , but can get much out of it .
hope this helps me out. thanxs